Monday, August 27, 2012

Having a tough time dealing with daycare

Today my son (my baby, my one and only far) started daycare.  I must say that this is one of the hardest things I've had to do so far (and I've been through a few challenges).  It's a small home daycare where he's the youngest of 3 kids so it's not so bad (or at least that's what I'm telling myself so I can feel better).  Besides the guilt associated with dropping my kid off with some random stranger and expecting him to cope with it ok, I'm also having separation difficulties.  I went back to work when he was around 3 months old but we've had my family and my husband's family taking care of him since then.  Needless to say they've done a wonderful job and my son ate up all the love and attention.  He's definitely a sweet, loveable and well-adjusted baby.  Now he's almost 7 months old (next week) and today was his first time being taken care of by non-family.  The caretaker seems really nice and she's experienced but I have some of the usual worries that mommies have when leaving their child with someone else.  I also have some of the crazy unusual worries too.  I am praying that I'll find strength to cope with this new stressor.  My husband has been supportive which is helpful.  It's tough for him too (I think) but of course he's coping well.  At least, I haven't seen him shed any tears yet.  I, on the other hand, cannot stop crying.  My baby was crying when I left him this morning.  It's so hard to leave my child with a stranger (or anyone) especially while he's crying.  But I didn't think it would have been any better if I stayed longer.  He would have just cried when he saw me walking out the door.  I called her back an hour later and she said that he took a short nap then woke up fussing.  What?  That is so unlike my happy baby.  This is so hard.

I have to keep reminding myself that I'm doing what's best for my family.  Although, I would love to stay home with him that is not what is best for our family.  I have a career.  Hubby and I have educational debts to pay off.  It's also helpful for him to be able to socialize with other kids.  I think his development will sky-rocket from being with the older kids (18 month old girl and 3 year old girl).

This is a unique week for me (as far as my work schedule) but it works out great.  The set up this week is great for transitioning.  I'm off today so I dropped him off a little later and I will pick him up earlier so it's not the full day.  I'm also off tomorrow so I'll let him stay a little longer tomorrow.  Wednesday is a full day.  Thursday and Friday are also shorter days for me.  We'll see how it goes.

I guess I just have to love on my baby a lot more when I pick him up.  Although, I don't know if that's possible because I already do that.  Anyway, I think I'll go hit the gym (first time since his birth).  Exercise has always been a good distraction for me.  So is shopping and cleaning but I don't feel like doing either right now.

I'll update you on how his first day ended.  I welcome any tips, words of encouragement, prayers :)

Mrs. K

Sunday, August 12, 2012

Baby K: Month 6

HAPPY 6TH MONTH BIRTHDAY.  Here's a recap of what you did your 5th month.

Week 22 Part 2
-I was home with you from the 4th of July until the end of the week.  It was nice being home with you again.  You are such a joy.  We hung out at the Mannings for 4th of July.  We went to bed early and didn't see any fireworks.  Maybe next year when you may be able to appreciate them.
-You are still eating rice cereal.  I had to back off a little because I think I made you constipated.  We both got a little excited with the new found solid food and went over board.  I think I made the cereal too thick and was feeding you too frequently.  One day this week you were crying so much and I could not do anything to soothe you.  You've never been like that before.  You were so upset.  You cried nonstop for about an hour then paused then started crying again.
-Still sleeping through the night
-This week marked the end of eye goop.  Yup, your lacrimal duct is actually large enough now (and developed enough) where your left eye no longer gets clogged with goop.  Gone are days when you would  cry and leave matter around your eye or fall asleep and wake up looking like one-eyed Jack. :).  I am just happy that your dad and I don't have to keep irritating you by cleaning your eye every 2 seconds.
-We visited the home daycare that we would like you to attend at the end of the summer.  You'll be close to 7 months then.  Your dad and I like it a lot for many reasons.  The kids seem happy, there are a lot of fun activities, and more.  Of course, it's clean and safe and all that goodness.  It's also close by our home.  I like that it's still small (12 kids) and there will be 1:3 ratio of staff:babies.  You'll also be with other kids and getting some peer interaction.  Right now there's no opening but we are on the list.  We are looking into other options, just in case.  There's a regular daycare close by the hospital that your dad and I work but it's way too expensive.  It's a bilingual daycare but we are not willing to pay all that money when you haven't even started talking yet.

Week 23
-My mom and brother are in town from Jamaica and they'll be hanging out with us the whole summer.  They are so in love with you.  My mom is super excited since you are her first grandchild.  You frequently comments about sweet and pleasant you are.  And I agree.
-This week you continue to sit without support.  You are so strong.  Of course I have to put you in the seated position but then you stay there for a long time.  You're not able to go from laying to seated position yet but I'm sure it'll happen soon.  You even lean forward and sit up in the bath tub.
-You continue to reach for everything in sight and put them in your mouth.  You reach with left and right hand but you seem to favor the left.  You also hold objects with both hands.  Your dad said that being a left handed pitcher would be good some day.  I wonder what sports you'll play.  Your dad played everything but mainly baseball.  I mainly ran track.  We both were, well ARE, fast and we are sure you will be too.  We can't wait until you are running around so that we can race you!
-You are still loving your baths.  Now that you are older you are enjoying playing with your bath toys.  You prefer the Squirtin' Sea Toys.  It's so fun to watch you play with them.  Once again I try to use most of our interactions for teaching.  I want you to view learning as fun.  We name the toys and describe their texture and colors.  You smile so big and laugh so hard when I squirt you with them.  I also like placing them in the water and watch you swat at them or try to pick them up.  Sometimes you grab your feet instead of toys.
-You are still not rolling over (much) but you move forward backwards and rotate when you are on your belly and back.
-You are very loud when you babble.
-In addition to making cute little "old man faces" you are also crossing your heel over your knee when you lay on your back.  It's the cutest thing because you look so much older than your age when you do that.  You also do this one-eyebrow-raised-thingy.  It's your curious look or your "mommy you're being silly" look.
-I think you are teething and it seems like you've been doing it for quite a few weeks now BUT no tooth has popped out yet.  You do this thing where you make a fist and try to rub your mouth but you miss half the time.  It's so funny to watch.   You also slam your mouth on my shoulder which you find funny and soothing.
-One of the BIG accomplishments this week is that I started you on real solid food.  I started rice cereal not too long ago, then converted to oatmeal cereal after a few days (because I read it was less constipating).  You seem to be doing better with this.  Also, I've started you on sweet potato puree.  I'm excited because I've accomplished my goal so far to make you baby food.  I bought the Beaba Babycook and I've been making you food.  It's great because it cooks it, purees it and it can also defrost if necessary.  It is so much fun to watch you try new foods.  You initially make a face because of the new texture and taste (I guess) but then you start loving it.  It's hysterical hearing you grunt because you want more and watch you turn away when you've had enough. So far you are a good eater.  I am so excited to see you try all the new foods.  I was going to wait until 6 months to start you on solids but I was so eager.
-Towards the end of the week you were refusing solid foods but I think it's because you had some nasal congestion that lasted 2 days.
-You are still sleeping through the night (from 7 or 8pm to about 6am).  I'm very thankful for this but I do miss our brief meetings (for feeding) at night.
-This week I got to spend a lot of time with you because my workload has been lighter and will likely be this way for the next year.  Thank God.
-FYI: You have an awesome father.  He loves you so much and he's also very good to me.  I am very thankful for him and you.  I pray for our family daily.

Week 24
-Holy cow I love you.  My love for you grows everyday as I get to know you and I spend more time with you.  I think you have such a great personality.  You are seriously a cool kid.
-You are sooo smiley.  You are also laughing out loud a lot more.  Your dad makes you laugh the most.  Whenever your dad or I walk by you, you put on a HUGE gummy grin (of course, still toothless).  Your smile is to die for.
-You laugh so loud and squeaky whenever we tickle you tummy.  Even if we pretend as we are going to do it, you start cracking up.
-We introduced another solid food this week, avocado.  I think you like it.  For a few days you did not want any solids but I think that was because you had some nasal congestion.  After that was resolved you were eating again.  You like avocado better then sweet potatoes so far.  I'm also still giving you cereal (oatmeal).  You make the funniest faces when you get the sweet potatoes then you spit them out.
-This week you mimicked your dad for the first time.  While I was feeding you cereal, he was showing you how to chew and you started opening your mouth and chewing like him.  We all celebrated.  It was so sweet to watch.  It was not coincidence because you did it several times.  You did it for me once but every time your dad was able to get you to do it.
-You are not rolling over regularly but you are doing other gross motor activities.  Well, actually you rolled over 2 or 3 times this week.  Anyway, you are sitting up unsupported for a long period of time.  Also in the bath, you refuse to be reclined.  You sit forward then hold on to the sides, pull yourself up (sometimes on your knees or feet), then hang over the side.  You think it's so funny and you laugh whenever you do it.
-You still get a kick out of looking at yourself in the mirror.
-You are "talking so much" and very loud too.
-Fingers and everything you can get your hands on go in your mouth.
-You are still nursing pretty ok.  You get distracted sometimes and I have to go to a quiet area to feed you.  You are just so social.
-This week you've been napping a lot better than last week.  We decided to swaddle you for naps (although you're kinda too old) because you nap longer that way.  We think naps are important and we want you take more than 20 minutes at a time.  Because you are napping better during the daytime we also notice that you are sleeping better at night.
-We are so proud of you and you give us so much joy.  We feel very blessed and honored to be your parents.  We will work very hard to raise you well and to be good role models.  We hope to make you proud some day.
-So scratch what I said above about not rolling over.  Starting mid week  you've been a rolling mad man.  It's so adorable to watch and I got one  of your first back to belly roll on camera.  You've been rolling every time I try to change your diaper.  Whenever I pick up your legs, you roll then end up doing this head stand thing.  It's so fun to watch.  You've also been pushing forward on your belly.  I guess crawling is one of your major upcoming milestones.

Week 25
-- OMG, you are the sweetest, cutest, smiliest, bestest baby ever.  Gosh, you smile for everything AND it's the best smile I've ever seen.  It brightens my day. 
-- You smile the biggest when you see your dad.  It's so cute how you watch your dad when he enters the room.  You fuss when you see me because you want me to hold you BUT you smile and laugh when you see daddy.
-- You've been reaching your arms out to me to pick you up.  It's so cute.
-- This week you enjoyed eating bananas mixed rice cereal and breast milk.  I think that's your favorite solid food so far.  After a few days of this, I also introduced you to prunes because you had a few days without a BM.  I've been making baby food for you at home so far, except for the prunes.  We used Earth's Best which you seem to like.  You also like their cereal too.
-- This week you are continuing to sit up without support and leaning forward as if to crawl.
-- You actually started doing this funny looking crawl thing.  It's so awesome to watch.
-- You still love your baths but now they are more difficulty because you try to bite the side of the bath tub, try to stand up, hang over the side.  You are a trip.
-- I had my first bad mommy moment with you this week that I'll have to tell you about some day.
-- You are still sleeping well at night, anywhere from 10-12 hours straight through.  You also nap on average 45 minutes to 90 minutes.  I think this helps with keeping your personality pleasant.  You are also so smart and alert.
-- You make faces that look exactly like your mommies.  It's kind of weird to see.  My mom points it out every time you do it.
-- We still think you look more like daddy.  You still have straight brown hair (although you sometimes have a little curl in the front).  Those big brown eyes get me every time.  Your little lips and nose are so sweet.  I love those little fingers and toesies too.
-- Still nursing and also giving you expressed milk.  Recently you've been gumming down whenever you nurse.  Hopefully you'll quit doing that before you get teeth.
-- This week was the opening ceremony of the 2012 Olympics.  Mommy is filled with so much excitement especially over track.  Your mommy always wanted to compete in the Olympics for track (100m, 200m) but instead focused on school.  Your dad and I hope that one day you will go to the Olympics.  That would be cool.
-- Actually we want you to do what you like, just as long as you work hard at it.  We'll support you as long as it's honest.

Week 26 
-- We love you so much our little smiley boy.  You are just so pleasant.  It's great to be around you.  You always have a huge smile on your face.  When someone walks up to you they are greeted by that STILL toothless grin.  However your daddy makes you smile the biggest.  It's so sweet to watch you two together.
-- You are pulling up to a stand, especially in the bath tub.  We have to be extremely careful because you have no sense of danger (except for freaking out when the blender is on then you let out a loud scream which is actually so funny)
--This week you are enjoying your solid foods.  I can't believe how much you are eating and you grunt to let us know when you want more.  This week you really like the prunes and sweet peas.
-- So far you've tried sweet potatoes, bananas, carrots, prunes, sweet peas.  And of course, rice and oatmeal cereal.  We plan to try apples, butternut squash, peaches soon.  So far, I love making you baby food AND you like eating them.
-- I've been feeding you 3 solid food meals per day.  This has been you're schedule.  One bottle (5 oz) or nurse every 3 hours + bananas mixed with breast milk 1 hour after 2nd meal + Earth's Best prunes 1 hour after 3rd meal + homemade baby food for last meal (after nursing).
-- I wonder if you're starting to experience a little separation anxiety.  You are clinging to me more and want to be held by me all the time.  You'll spend a few seconds to minutes with someone else but then you are ready to come back to me.  If you hear my voice but don't see me you kind of freak out.  I know this is just one of your many interesting phases.  And you've also been reaching out towards me when you want me to pick you up.  You're so smart
-- You are still sitting up well without support.  Sometimes you lean forward and get on your knees but you don't stay there for very long.  For the past 2 weeks or so, you've been doing the military crawl.  You are very vocal but we can't make sense of any of your sounds, although some of them sound similar.
-- You love watching our dogs act silly.  We go outside almost daily so that you can observe them.  They usually make you smile or laugh.  They try to come up to you but I only let them lick your feet.
-- My mom comments about how smart you are because you are so well behaved, especially in public.  It's like you know you're not at home so you have to conduct yourself in a certain manner :).  You don't fuss or whine--you mainly smile and observe your surroundings.
-- Naps have been a little challenging this week because you want to be social.  You are still sleeping through the night but you wake up early. 
-- This week we researched childcare options and found a place for you.  It's  a home daycare and the woman keeps up to 4 kids (you'll be number 3).  She seems very sweet and the home is safe.  The other 2 kiddos seem very happy and they like you.  I think it will be a good fit.  I do worry about whether or not he'll get any educational exposure.  I also worry about what appears to be complete lack of structure (especially for a control freak like myself).  The good thing is that she's sweet and flexible and is willing to put up with some of my madness.  Our main concern is that you are well taken care of and are safe.
-- Your dad and I love everything about you.  We feel very blessed to be your parents.  I hope you stay sweet, like your dad.

Mrs. K

Mrs. K


Related Posts with Thumbnails